I have hair just as messy as my life and I barely doodles.

@madisnake

confirmance:

Me: *Drops chocolate on the floor.*

Me: 👀

My Dog: 👀

*Kill Bill Sirens*

(Source: sodomymcscurvylegs)

saltheartedbarmaid:

kane52630:

madejlesbian:

“i made a kid cry we’re going to hell”

One of the rare times Eric Andre broke character

“I don’t even like talking to people in the daytime” me too, Hannibal

(Source: madejsbian)

butchscientist:

butchscientist:

i just had the absolute WORST realization

glee would have covered despasito

alexander:

Waitress says “say when” while grating my cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan. There are no survivors.

(Source: pastadogs)

dungeons-and-dumbies:

Cave in a Fantasy Setting: *exists*

Giant Spiders:

filthy-rat:

averagefairy:

ok can we agree that the WORST feeling is when you’re just sitting around consciously procrastinating and you’re just overly aware that each second that passes is more time wasted and you like watch hours pass and you’re STILL procrastinating and you CANT STOP and your panicked brain is trapped inside a body that refuses to be productive and inside you’re screaming but outwardly you’re just eating chips 

earthdad:

me, bleeding to death: help…. me

friend running in: WHAT HAPPENED?? WHO DID THIS TO YOU???

me, pointing: he… he did it

the murderer in the distance:

semitics:

semitics:

Why are men

I literally didn’t even finish this statement

(Source: soloveitchik)

copics-n-ink:

threshie:

frostedpuffs:

iM???? kkshd;bgdjsmmsnd;sn;

An orc wrote this.

An orc who knows how to treat a lady